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Friday, December 21, 2007♥
I've got all the syptoms of a girl with a broken heart ♥ 8:26 AM
HOW TO KNOW IF SOMEONE DOESNT CARE FOR YOU?
You made a mistake of sending "Maybe we should break up" msg. And he doesn't bother call you or msg you for 48 hrs. You apologise, you call his HP several times, you call his house, you msg him... but no, he doesn't care. He only finally called me at 4 plus am this morning, and that was only bcoz I was at the point of begging. I wanted to know a reason.
HOW TO KNOW YOU'RE A FOOL?
You waited 48hours, begged him, apologised, called his house just for one ****ing reply.
19Feb, 4pm.
SMS.
ME: Zie, I called him and I msg him, he stil havent reply, I wonder whether he's ok...
19feb, 11pm.
CALL.
ME: Zie. Aku tak tau ape da jadik ngan dier. He's suppose to be at work now... He should be awake right now. He should have read my msg. RIGHT?
Zie: Maybe dier sakit.
ME: THAT'S BAD. CAMNE!
Zie: Calm down, gerl. Tgu bsok pagi k? Maybe he's just tired.
20feb. 10am.
MASS SMS.
ME To Zie, syira, ain, shah : TOO MANY ****ing SMS TO COUNT.
Did he even know how worried I was? NO. He didn't give a shit.
Well, whatever it's over now. I realise that.
And can you believe it? I wanted to send an sms to syira, telling her what a ****ing wreck I am right now and accidentally send it to him. Possibilities why: 1) his name and syira's name are next to each other. 2) I've been thinking about it too much. 3) Shit happens.
Well, anyway, the deed was done and if anyone were to read that msg, ... ouh i dunoo but no, he didn't say a damn thing. **** that. It's over. He's gone. Time to get my life back in order. I stopped contacting my male friends for him.... now it's time to get some new ones or get the old ones back.
iLa, u've been a fool too many times. For men who never loved you.
I'm hungry btw. But I can't eat. I haven't eaten for 2 days. I just nibble and throw away the food. There's potluck at the office today... I'm suppose to bring something. But I just didn't have the ****ing strength to buy old chang kee, to do anything for that matter. SLEEP? I haven't slept for 2 days. I couldn't even get my makeup right. I laughed at myself this morning when I looked into the mirror. My eyes were swollen. My feet can't move. I'm surprised that I got myself to work. HAHA. Well, whatever.
BTW, MR HUSSARI ISMAIL, IF U EVER EVEN CARE TO READ MY BLOG EVER AGAIN, THIS IS FOR YOU.
This is what you want, this is what you'll have. I know my tears mean nothing to you. I hope you'll be happy. Really I do. U've already moved on in 48 hours. I'll move on in 48 months. I really wanted to make it work, make changes, change myself, make stupid sacrifices. But u already given up. I gave up on waking you up to go to work, but you gave up on this relationship. So I'm kinda proud of myself in a way this time. I wasn't the one who gave up on this relationship, YOU did. I tried this time, I really tried. Like ****ing shit, I tried. I blardy cooked. I blardy cooked for him. Amazing isn't it? Nah. Whatever. U have what you want now. TAKE CARE. Enjoy ok? I hope you get a better girl than me. All the best.
your crazy touch, the strangest rush
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