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Tuesday, April 15, 2008♥
♥ 6:08 PM
I am SUPER PISSED off at my mum.
WTH! If I want to spend hundreds or thousands on my HP bill, it's my blardy problem. Coz it's MY hard-earned money. Even if I decide to spend my money on gigolos one day, it's my ****ing problem la. I earned it what. On my own. It's been since I finished secondary school, I've pretty much been earning for myself. So why nag at me, telling me what I should do with my money and even worse, criticise me and my work?
Here when I'm doing overtime, and there you are critising me. THKS LA EH! THKS SO MUCH! Blardy hell, if I don't do overtime, DO YOU THINK THIS WORK IS GOING TO FINISH BY ITSELF?!! FUNNY, if that was possible, I wouldn't have a job in the first place. If you really want me to lose my job, just tell me lah. TAKYA buang2 masa lagi la.
Blardy shit. Here I am working my ass off and what credit do you give me?
Don't say I never think of you la. If not for you, I would been long gone from this job ok! I wanted to leave when I first started remember? BUT because I wanted to SAVE YOU SOME FACE, I gritted my teeth and pulled through. Ok, let's not even talk about that... If not I had thought of you, I would have left home LONG ago. But then again, it's also only bcoz of you, that I ever even thought about leaving home.
So if your idea of pestering me while I'm at work makes you feel better, go ahead, but sure as hell pisses me off big time.
Why can't you let me grow up? U cannot seem to decide if you want us to be adults or not.
One minute, you want us to behave like adults... saying "Why can't you all just grow up? Act more like grown-ups. Can't think for urselves!".
Next minute, you're saying "You all think you adults oredi izit? Make decisions don't know to ask me."
Why the contradiction? Why the confusion?
And I'll never forget the day I set myself for disappointment. I did my research and was really excited. Printed and arranged my papers. Got really excited to show you, tell you about all the things that made me want to go. FOR ONCE, I wanted share part of my life with you, share my ambitions, share parts of me that I'm always keeping secret. But you just walked away. Just like that. Ya, you can say you were busy that time, but you could have told me that we could talk about it another time when you were free instead of just brushing me off. There I was with all my research, all excited, ready to believe that you'd give me a chance. But you never did. All you had to say was everything negative against my idea. How this girl wanted you so much to listen to why... But you didn't listen. U don't even realise how important that conversation Doesn't matter rite? It'll always be that way. For everytime I was happy, you did something to destroy every ounce of happiness I had. U HAVE NO IDEA JUST HOW MUCH.
EVERY ****ing time. Like my frenz, like my boyfren, like a job I really really want, like my poly idea, like my events at school, like my dream course. Even when I get to see my grandmother once in a blue moon... U want to take away the time I spend with her too. My only grandmother.
"Ouh skrg da keje byk duit, taknak balik arh?"
I mean WTF kan. U think it's for fun laa? The migraines and the fatigue... WHAT? NEW HOBBY ISIT?!
Tak boleh tahan. SIAL LA, it's my hard-earned money sak. **** it la.
THAT'S IT LAH. I'm through. You can tell point out to me all the things I am and that I'm not. I can do the same to you.
Like mother, like daughter.
Eff la. Just don't blame me if I walk out.
your crazy touch, the strangest rush
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